How did YOU mix it up?

Teaching Tolerance held another Mix It Up at Lunch event on October 28th this year and our middle school participated.

Students knew the day was coming as our Advisory lessons the week before focused on Mix It Up Day.  I find that this is a VERY difficult day for many students.  It takes them out of their comfort zone at the very time where maybe they feel the most comfort...lunch.  Does that mean we shouldn't do it?  NO WAY!!!  :)

I LOVE Mix It Up Day and how it stretches kids to connect with different people.  This is a super important life skill and I love that they get to practice it in middle school.

Here is how we organized the event:  We counted the tables in the lunch room (30).  Then we bought 30 helium filled balloons from the Dollar Tree ($1 each) and numbered them 1-30.  As kids came into the cafeteria, we numbered their hands with a Sharpie 1-30.  They just had to find the table with the appropriate numbered balloon.  At the table, we placed laminated front/back lists of questions to get the conversation going.  

Of course, we did have those students who tried to change their number and dodge the event (mostly 8th graders), but for the most part it was successful.  It was a lot quieter than regular lunch.  :)

How did you mix it up?

Parent Phone Calls

One of the things I hate most in life is making phone calls.  I just don't like calling people on the phone...especially with cell phones.  How do I know if I am calling at a good time?  Perhaps the person is driving and our conversation could cause an accident.  Lots of thoughts go through my mind!  :)

Since going into the field of education, I have learned to force myself to make the necessary phone calls.  I may not like it, but I think I do a pretty good job of calming down an angry parent...especially now that I am a school counselor and have been trained to handle sticky situations.

The cartoon above shows how many parents hold the school responsible for the grades that are reported rather than holding the student responsible as in the past.  I would have to agree that we do see this more and more.  Not sure why we see it, but my guess it has to do with parents being so much busier.  Nowadays both parents working is very common and parents just do not have as much time with their kids when they are running them to and from different activities.  Do parents and students really have the time to talk about grades?

This is my 2nd year as a school counselor and yesterday I recieved a very disgruntled parent phone call.  Much like the above cartoon, the dad blamed the school, and me, in particular for not doing everything we could to help his son be successful.  The phone call really upset me because I felt like I stumbled with my words and got a little snarky with the parent.  I just didn't feel good at the end of the conversation and this was the first time in my counseling career that that has happened.

Thank goodness for collaboration!!  I shared the gist of what happened with our other school counselor just so that I could get it off my chest and to see if maybe she would have handled it differently.  She did make some comments that I had not thought to bring up with the parent, but basically she said the parent must have been in a place where he didn't want any help...he just wanted to vent.  Maybe I could have been more empathetic, or said something a little differently...sure.  BUT...more importantly we cannot let negative situations get us down!  He is one parent in our building.  ONE.  I have successfully worked with many many more!  :)

As a solution focused school counselor, I need to think about solutions and moving forward rather than staying stuck on one interaction.

The truth is...this parent really cares about his son!  How thankful I am for that!

Best Year Ever!

We just completed the first week of school and it was quite a success!

Monday was Jumpstart Day for our 6th graders.  It was an optional shorter day, organized to be fun yet allow the 6th graders to feel comfortable with lockers, class location, teachers, etc. before the 7th and 8th graders arrive.  IT WAS A GREAT DAY!  Smiles everywhere!  It ended with a tug of war competition between some of the 6th graders and the teachers.  Everyone in the gym was cheering on the 6th grade players.  I loved watching the teachers right behind the players as they cheered, encouraged, supported, and offered tips in the hopes of winning the competition.   AND when the 6th grade players were losing their footing and started to slide, the teachers jumped in and helped pull the rope!  :)  What a great metaphor for the teacher-student relationship!!

Tuesday was our first "real" day.  We have a little over 600 students in our 6-8 building.  How exciting to see them come in, ready for a new year!

Over the first few days of school, the teachers are required to teach several PBIS lessons to make sure our entire school knows the expectations.  This might not be the most exciting thing to teach, but it is definitely a necessity.  The students are doing very well with following directions as the teachers are using common language and are really working hard to be consistent.  It sure pays off!!  As I was walking in the building last week, it just FELT GOOD!  Students were engaged and learning was taking place!  :)  I hope we keep this positive energy up all year long!!

How was your start to school?

Back to School! :)

I am back!  Took a summer vacation both from the blog and from school.  Am feeling refreshed and ready for another year!  :)

Last week was the first week back for counselors in my building.  One of our jobs at this time of the year is scheduling students.  Wow!  What a tremendous responsibility!!

Last year, as a brand new counselor and new person to my building, I was not a part of the beginning of the year scheduling.  My colleague is very good at chunking my responsibilities so I am not overwhelmed all at once.  :)  This year I am taking a much more active role in the process.  Wow!.  So much to figure out!  So much to take into consideration!  Lots of creativity needed with some schedules.

We've had a lot of hiccups in the scheduling process.  Last night our assistant principal, the other counselor, and myself worked on schedules from 8:00 a.m. until 9:30 p.m. with about a 20 minute lunch around 11:00 a.m.  My eyes got tired from reading all those names/numbers/classes.  There were a few students I had to call to ask for their preference when it came to hard decisions regarding electives.  I called one young lady last night and she said she would call back with her response.  She didn't call back before I left to go home.

This morning I thought about this girl.  Before I could call her back, one of our secretaries told me that her family was here to talk to someone about her schedule.  The girl's last name was hispanic (this is important for later on in my story).  When I saw the girl's family I greeted them and explained the situation to the mom and the girl.  Both listened intently.  When I finished, the girl translated my explanation to Spanish for her mom.  Her mom then asked her to ask me a question about one of the classes.

So I switched from speaking in English to Spanish and explained it all to them.  It was a great opportunity for me to practice my Spanish and make the girl's job a little easier, as well as put the mom at ease.  This was the first time in my counseling role that I've gotten the chance to really use my Spanish with families.  It felt so good!  :)

So tonight was Schedule Pick Up Night.  I have been dreading this night a little.  Not just because it is a late night for us, but because this is one of the responsibilities our assistant principal gave to me when I started last year.  I was in charge of organizing everything.  Pretty overwhelming by itself, but then throw in working for several days on schedules and trying to tie up last minute details all at once.  I am not good at planning events.  I am a last minute girl so this is just really not my thing.  Well...it went off well tonight!  :)Yeah!!

As much work as goes into nights like tonight, it still is so very rewarding to me.  I LOVE greeting new families and reconnecting with previous ones.  There is something about starting over each new year!  The kids and parents are excited...and so am I!!!!!  :)

Mediation

Today one of our administrators asked me to schedule a mediation between two sixth grade girls.  I must say it was the most successful mediation I have witnessed.  The girls were so respectful of each other and realized pretty soon that all of their issues were based on unsubstantiated rumors!

Per my administrator, I had each girl follow up with a phone call home to explain how they resolved the conflict.  As they packed up their books to go back to class, one of the girls stopped to give me a hug.  

This was one situation where the girls had met previously and got along famously, but when school started in the fall they were placed on different teams and did not get a chance to really continue that friendship while at school.  They would see each other at school, but only in passing.  Being able to provide the girls with a place to meet, expectations to follow, and time to clear the air was exactly what the girls needed!

Not always do we see the fruit of our efforts, but when we do, it can sure fill our buckets!  :)  This is just another reason why I LOVE my job!  :)

The rapid way rumors were spread and fighting was encouraged by peers lead me to think ahead for classroom guidance lessons for next year.  Do any of you teach a lesson on peer conflict/rumors?  I would love to hear from you!!!!!

The Extraordinary School Counselor: Self-Injury & Self-Harm

If you have not found The Extraordinary School Counselor yet, this is a GREAT time to check out this amazing blog!  

The most  recent blog post is an excellent resource with information about self-injury and self-harm.  Check out the blog:  The Extraordinary School Counselor

Liebster Award

The Middle School Counselor is one of my favorite blogs.  If you do not know Carol Miller, she has an AMAZING internet presence.  She blogs, tweets, creates SMores, pins, and started my favorite Facebook group, Caught in the Middle School Counselors.  She does more than that...AND she is a fantastic school counselor with fabulous ideas!  I have learned so much from her this year!!!  Today, she notified me that she nominated me for the Liebster Award.

What an incredible honor!  Thank you so much Carol Miller!

So, what is the Liebster award?  It is an award that honors new bloggers who have 200 or less followers.  The award promotes the nominee's blog while informing blog readers about the blogger.

Here are the rules associated with the award:

1.  Link back to the blog that nominated you.
2.  Nominate 5-11 blogs with fewer than 200 followers.
3.  Answer the questions posted for you by your nominator.
4.  Create 11 questions for your nominees.
5.  Contact your nominees and let them know you nominated them.

Thank you again Carol Miller!  I truly do feel honored!

Following directions, I will now answer the 11 questions:

1.  What are your favorite blogs?  This is a tough one!  My favorites are:

• The Middle School Counselor
• JYJ Counselor Blog
• School Counselor Space
• The Helpful Counselor

2.  Why did you decide to begin blogging?  I started blogging because I wanted to journal my first year as a school counselor.  I know too well how time can pass by and my memory does not always serve me as well as a journal would.  :)  I was especially inspired by others who have such amazing blogs.  I wanted to be able to educate others like they did me.

3.  Who do you follow on Pinterest?  I follow some of my friends to get ideas for dinner and such, but most of my Pinterest time is spent on school counseling ideas.  I follow The Helpful Counselor, Franciene Sabens, School Counselor Central, Becca Lenger, Lena Sheets (Becca and Lena are good friends and grad school classmates), Julia V. Taylor, Danielle Schulz, and Carol Miller.

4.  Do you have a favorite counseling lesson?  I think my favorite lesson is one on anger management.  I have the students think about their anger when it is out of control.  Then, I give them a balloon and we equate uncontrolled anger to a balloon out of control.  I have the students blow up the balloon and hold it (don't tie it shut).  Then, I have them predict where they think the balloon will go.  Next, they release the balloon and try to recreate the movement of the balloon.  Finally, they discuss with a partner what happened when the balloon was realeased and how that is similar to anger that is out of control.  It really helps them visualize how unpredictable their anger can be and how it affects others.

5.  How do you connect with other counselors?  I am blessed to work in a counseling office with two other counselors:  a school counselor and an outreach counselor.  As a new counselor, I consult with them daily.  I work in a rather large school district.  The middle school counselors get together every other month for a breakfast meeting.  It is a great way for us to stay informed.  I also use facebook, twitter, and blogging sites to stay connected with counselors all around the globe.  :)

6.    What technology/apps would make your job more      
difficult if you had to do without?  Our school information system allows us to look up various information on our students.  I don't know what I would do without it!  

7.    What is your favorite thing about being a counselor?  I get to connect with so many different people!  I support students, parents, and other staff members on a daily basis! There is never a dull moment.  :)  After teaching for 19 years, I find it refreshing that I can leave my office at the end of the day and enjoy my family!!  :)

8.    What are 3 things about you most of us don't know?  1--My parents had 3 foreign exchange students from Spain (just for summers), 2--When I was 8 my parents were foster parents to two other children:  Dawn & Danny, 3--I once won a costume contest for dressing up as Carrie from the movie with the same title.

9.    What is your favorite ice cream flavor?  Butter pecan

10.  What do you do in your free time?  Watch my son's lacrosse games!  :)

11.  What is your best piece of advice for a student?  Concentrate on the things you can change.

Now...here are the questions I have for the nominees:

1.  How long have you been in your profession?
2.  What sparked your interest in your current career?
3.  Who was your favorite teacher and why was he/she your favorite?
4.  What inspires you?
5.  What is your favorite social media and what makes it your favorite?
6.  What was the last conference you attended?
7.  If you could travel anywhere, where would it be?
8.  How do you practice self care?
9.  Where do you see yourself in the next 5 years?
10. What is your favorite book?
11. Describe yourself in one word.

In turn, my nominations for the Liebster award are:

• The School Counselor's Chronicle
• School Counselor Companion
• Stuck in the Middle & Loving It!
• Scrapbook of a School Counselor
• Schoolcounselor.com Must See Videos

Congratulations Bloggers!  I look forward to reading your responses!  :)